if things could be much much simpler..
Suddenly l.o.v.e isnt just about 2 person.
i see other factors pouring in.

I guess i knew it right from the start things wld turn out like tt.
but the stubborn me just refuse to face it right frm den.
i never want to give up a battle w/o giving it a try.

but... today. things seem alil different.
I appreciate and really love the "never give up" attitude from you.
I thank you for everything tat happen
but whatever happen ytd seems like a very big warning to me
or more like i see myself falling out with her..
i dun wanna turn into a rebellious person
i know im suppose to fight for the things i love
but how can i fight when everything matters so much to me

How can i fight when suddenly it feels like the ending is set.
(the word is feel)
In fact, i dun see a perfect ending from her
They are stubborn ppl to begin with.
Ppl who doesnt change their minds
Its not as easy as you think
I know you will never give up
but.. being in my shoes how would you feel.
I know the answer would be : i will never give up

but.. im different.
probably im not as mentally strong as you
or maybe im just afraid
maybe only i know them best
but i do not know how to put it across

I do not want things to fall apart.
I do not want to hurt them
A happy ending after a long painful journey.
Nope i do not want them to be sad just to get what i want
How many must i hurt to get what i want
thats too selfish
At least for me.
They matter alot to me

I understand where you are coming from
but shes firm with her stand

I need you to understand, whatever happens..
be it good or bad.
happy ending or sad ending
im not like the rest
i will not regret
rather i will thank you for everything that happen

dun live for me. dun live for love
cause your existence matters
and it hurts to knw that if there is no love i would rather not exist ever again

I see where both of us are coming from.

Exams are officially over. There are loads of things to await for ((: and i can start doing things that i love.

Met up with roy the day before and did some catching up. Went out with idam ytd to chill and walk around.

RAR. I have to plan my timetable within 2 days. Hopefully, the school will allow me to reg. my subjects earlier since i will in Korea during that time =x
Anyway i was on the bus today when i saw an advertisement that caught my eye. It goes like this:

Breathe in:
Hope
Life Securities
..

Breathe out:
Pessimism
Insecurities
...

How true.!

1 day to meeting my partner for meeting agenda
3 days to meeting the girls and jon for steamboat
4 days to desaru recee
5 days to pelepah recee
6 days to subcomm meeting and meeting kimmie.
7 days to Korea
11 days to MY BIRTHDAY.!

((: loves.

ohoh. I have receive my advance birthday present from "dumb2". Waiting for my actual and more more.. i love my birthday. Most of all receiving wishes and presents from my friends and family. i feel extremely loved on that day. i love feeling loved.
I hope to celebrate my birthday in sg with a BANG next year. ((:

the flashbacks were strong. but i guess its possible to handle. im melissa.

thanks so much for your understanding.
thanks for calming me down and letting me know all wld be fine.
thanks for having faith in me ((:

thanks for everything ((:

rar.
want exams to be over soon.
wanna start doing camps with my frens. i miss those times. ((:

those late night debriefs. cold shower. campfire. eating session with all your friends. late night calls to ur frens when ur stuck in a situation. those kids who never fail to put a smile across your face though they do test your patients at times. learning how to communicate with every single one of them in their way and not yours. learn to understand what they want. see how they grow and change during the 3days.

i can still clearly remember how this boy went into camp not wanting to do anything and he even kick fuss about not wanting to pitch the tent. But in the end, he was one of the greatest help tt i cld get. He and his gang of guy frens. Not neglecting the group of girls who were also there. All they need was just alil attention from us. A sense of resposibility does great wonders. that was wad i learn from you.

those thank yous. those goodbyes. i wont forget every single one of them. those experience make me grow. do you all feel the same way too.?

time to start studying.

you probably wldnt be reading this. but i hope you grow out from the hurt tt u had. dun lose confidence in yourself. you are gonna be fine. ((: lifes short. live it to the fullest. you are a great person.

Wierd thoughts.

My parents departed for their 2nd honeymoon this morning.
woohoo. hope they enjoy themselves over at bintan and bring home loads of gifts.

For me, i like the peace tat i have at home now as it allows me to study much better. The best part is my brother has no choice but to become more independent in whatever he does for the next 3 days. ((: and im loving it.

Have you ever thought of this..
Who do u think is more "fortunate".?
A girl who grows up and look more like a guy or A guy who grows up and look more like a girl ?

To me, i think the latter is better. At least that guy can be known as a pretty boy. And most pretty boys are lovable. What do you think?

A thought to set you thinking...

Random.

Im still very much in love with their songs... and the band itself ((:
There's something different about them.
and i cant exactly point out what it is. MLB jiayou ah.!

Was it the effort they take to maintain a personal touch with their fans/ them being more down to earth or... that make them so different.

RAR. I still have a mountain of work to clear. and somehow i feel like im not living in reality. its a weird feeling but i cant put it in exact words. =x

-Mel ((:

dont bother to plan. you really dont have to. im gonna be busy and i know it. your thoughts are greatly appreciated.

And when i said that friends come first, it doesnt mean that ur a spare tyre. rar. never mind.

and when i say WHAT. it doesnt mean im piss. its just the way i say it.

I thought you could at least understand/know where im coming from but i guess i was wrong all along. It just seems like everything is all about toleration.
and yesh. the word understand.

Suddenly, i think i probably just dont understand you too.